I did the spin class!
7am yesterday morning there I was - tiring myself out for the day! I enjoyed it though and although I was tired for the remainder of the day (also had a migraine later in the afternoon - always fun!) I loved the satisfaction of having it 'done' for the day.
I'm up early again tomorrow to do a half hour Body Pump class.
Am sat here watching Supersize v Superskinny. It's easy to judge but there but for the grace of God go I. My blood pressure was taken the other at the gym and it's a little higher than it should be. I'm starting to get scared about what continuing on this track will do to my long term health.
I will do this. I have to.
xxx
Thursday, 5 July 2012
Tuesday, 3 July 2012
I've joined the gym...
The last few days have not been great food wise. I've made the tough but right decision to pull out of the NYC trip. Money and my lack of fitness are my reasons. I'm giving myself a few more days to think it through but think my decision is pretty final.
So, on to a more positive note - I've joined the gym! There is a Fitness First club less than 5 minutes away from my flat - it's one I've worked out at before - it has a pool, spin studio, etc.
Tomorrow before work I plan on completing my first workout - a spin class!!!
Here goes nothing!!!
xxx
So, on to a more positive note - I've joined the gym! There is a Fitness First club less than 5 minutes away from my flat - it's one I've worked out at before - it has a pool, spin studio, etc.
Tomorrow before work I plan on completing my first workout - a spin class!!!
Here goes nothing!!!
xxx
Thursday, 28 June 2012
What I ate today
Breakfast
1 Wheat Biscuit
2 Slices Allinson Wholemeal Bread
1 spread Butter
Total - 345.5kcal
Lunch
Tuna & Cucumber Sandwich
Total - 265.0kcal
Dinner
Jacket Potato with Cheese & Beans
Total - 808.2kcal
Snacks
Natural Yoghurt with Apple & Strawberries
Total - 154.6kcal
Drinks
2 Coffees made with Semi Skimmed milk and 2 sugars
2 Teas made with skimmed milk
2 litres water
50ml Ribena
Total - 132.2
Total calories for today - 1705kcal
1 Wheat Biscuit
2 Slices Allinson Wholemeal Bread
1 spread Butter
Total - 345.5kcal
Lunch
Tuna & Cucumber Sandwich
Total - 265.0kcal
Dinner
Jacket Potato with Cheese & Beans
Total - 808.2kcal
Snacks
Natural Yoghurt with Apple & Strawberries
Total - 154.6kcal
Drinks
2 Coffees made with Semi Skimmed milk and 2 sugars
2 Teas made with skimmed milk
2 litres water
50ml Ribena
Total - 132.2
Total calories for today - 1705kcal
Wednesday, 27 June 2012
What I ate today
Breakfast
50g Oats
125g Natural Yoghurt
1 Pink Lady Apple
50g Strawberries
Breakfast Total - 326.5kcal
Lunch
2 slices Allinson Wholemeal Bread
1 spread Butter
2 slices Corned Beef
Lunch Total - 413.4kcal
Dinner
Turkey Jambalaya
Dinner Total - 527.9kcal
Snacks
1 Mini Babybel Light Cheese
Snacks Total - 42.0kcal
Drinks
2 x Tea made with skimmed milk
2 x Coffee made with semi-skimmed milk and 1 sugar
Innocent Apple Juice
2 litres water
Drinks Total - 205.2kcal
Total Calories - 1515kcal
50g Oats
125g Natural Yoghurt
1 Pink Lady Apple
50g Strawberries
Breakfast Total - 326.5kcal
Lunch
2 slices Allinson Wholemeal Bread
1 spread Butter
2 slices Corned Beef
Lunch Total - 413.4kcal
Dinner
Turkey Jambalaya
Dinner Total - 527.9kcal
Snacks
1 Mini Babybel Light Cheese
Snacks Total - 42.0kcal
Drinks
2 x Tea made with skimmed milk
2 x Coffee made with semi-skimmed milk and 1 sugar
Innocent Apple Juice
2 litres water
Drinks Total - 205.2kcal
Total Calories - 1515kcal
Saturday, 16 June 2012
Owning your actions
Happy Weekend!
The boy is on a stag do in Newquay so I've been free as a bird for the past 24 hours. He'll be back tomorrow though which is good - I've already had my fill of alone time!
Over the last few days I have been trying to regain some control and structure into my eating. It is by no means perfect, but I feel much more committed than I have done in a long time, to getting real results. Not only that, but I am believing that I CAN actually achieve my goal. The only thing stopping me from reaching them, is me.
Obvious no?
Yet coming to this realisation is slowly filtering its way into how I'm eating. I spent a few hours this morning doing an online grocery shop, planning my weekly menu and entering the data here. This is me taking control. I know I have the determination to lose weight (I have done it before after all), but all of the previous failed attempts often mean that my 'diet starts Monday' attitude gets in the way and I rarely make it past losing a few lbs.
I am the only one who can get me to lose weight.
Others can assist, help me along the way, but ultimately it is up to me, and the actions that I take.
It's often said that the weight doesn't go on overnight, so you can't expect to lose it overnight, and I don't. Previously I've let how long it is going to take stand in my way. But here's the thing, the time will pass anyway. It already has. That diet I started back in 2008 was going to take time, but now it's 2012 and I'm 4 stone heavier and wishing I'd finished what I'd started then!
In the next five years I hope to hit some non weight related personal goals. To achieve them at the weight I currently am would be a hollow victory, because I know that underneath it all I still wouldn't be happy. I want the whole package dammit! I have the ability to achieve all of it, it's just going to take some hard work.
And for once, I actually believe it could happen, it's all about taking action.
The boy is on a stag do in Newquay so I've been free as a bird for the past 24 hours. He'll be back tomorrow though which is good - I've already had my fill of alone time!
Over the last few days I have been trying to regain some control and structure into my eating. It is by no means perfect, but I feel much more committed than I have done in a long time, to getting real results. Not only that, but I am believing that I CAN actually achieve my goal. The only thing stopping me from reaching them, is me.
Obvious no?
Yet coming to this realisation is slowly filtering its way into how I'm eating. I spent a few hours this morning doing an online grocery shop, planning my weekly menu and entering the data here. This is me taking control. I know I have the determination to lose weight (I have done it before after all), but all of the previous failed attempts often mean that my 'diet starts Monday' attitude gets in the way and I rarely make it past losing a few lbs.
I am the only one who can get me to lose weight.
Others can assist, help me along the way, but ultimately it is up to me, and the actions that I take.
It's often said that the weight doesn't go on overnight, so you can't expect to lose it overnight, and I don't. Previously I've let how long it is going to take stand in my way. But here's the thing, the time will pass anyway. It already has. That diet I started back in 2008 was going to take time, but now it's 2012 and I'm 4 stone heavier and wishing I'd finished what I'd started then!
In the next five years I hope to hit some non weight related personal goals. To achieve them at the weight I currently am would be a hollow victory, because I know that underneath it all I still wouldn't be happy. I want the whole package dammit! I have the ability to achieve all of it, it's just going to take some hard work.
And for once, I actually believe it could happen, it's all about taking action.
Sunday, 10 June 2012
Guess who's back
Morning!
I have been forced against my will to be an early Sunday riser. I could not get to sleep last night and instead of enjoying the luxury of it being a weekend where I could lie-in, my body clock has decided I need to be awake at 7:!5am! On a Sunday! Ugh. Not happy. However, it has given me the perfect opportunity to post a well overdue update! Here goes!
In April the boy and I finally moved out of the parentals into a lovely coach house flat in Cheltenham. We love it. It's the perfect size for us, and despite a few teething issues involving tv aerials and leaking washing machines, we have settled in very nicely. We bought some new furniture such as wardrobes, chest of drawers, coffee table and tv stand but on the whole have been fortunate to be donated a bed and abusing my mother's discount card for things like bed sheets and crockery.
Also in April I started my new job. I *think* (*whispers*) it's going well. I've began studying for an exam and seem to get on well with my colleagues. I hope that it allows me to grow professionally and move forward and progress. I still don't really know what I want to do 'when I grow up', but perhaps for some people this takes longer to achieve. Maybe some never find it. Maybe some people use their hobbies and outside interests to their jobs to get their kicks.
Isn't it funny how you can be completely rational about a topic in the light of day, but when you're trying to sleep at 2am things like not knowing what you want to do when you feel many of your friends do know and are achieving their goals in their fields seems to bother you so much you can't sleep? Attached to this problem of sleep was once again my weight. Obviously!
Sadly I still have not lost anything. That's not to say I've gained, but my best efforts seem to fall by the wayside come evenings. I will do this, I just believe it's going to take a while. I've been super encouraged by this lady's journey and I take a lot of strength from seeing others success.
I've also done a bit of walking in the last few months. My last big walk was a few weeks ago when the weather was still good. My mum and I walked 16 miles. I wore my usual trainers but they began blistering my feet around mile 6 but I continued on which was either brave or stupid depending on your viewpoint! I've invested in some new walking trainers that I hope will see me through. I'm already wearing them on the walk to work (yes - no more traffic queues or public trasnport!) and they seem to be ok.
I think that's more than enough of an update for one day! I hope not to leave it so long next time.
I'll leave you with a pic of me exploring some woods near our new home :)
xxx
I have been forced against my will to be an early Sunday riser. I could not get to sleep last night and instead of enjoying the luxury of it being a weekend where I could lie-in, my body clock has decided I need to be awake at 7:!5am! On a Sunday! Ugh. Not happy. However, it has given me the perfect opportunity to post a well overdue update! Here goes!
In April the boy and I finally moved out of the parentals into a lovely coach house flat in Cheltenham. We love it. It's the perfect size for us, and despite a few teething issues involving tv aerials and leaking washing machines, we have settled in very nicely. We bought some new furniture such as wardrobes, chest of drawers, coffee table and tv stand but on the whole have been fortunate to be donated a bed and abusing my mother's discount card for things like bed sheets and crockery.
Also in April I started my new job. I *think* (*whispers*) it's going well. I've began studying for an exam and seem to get on well with my colleagues. I hope that it allows me to grow professionally and move forward and progress. I still don't really know what I want to do 'when I grow up', but perhaps for some people this takes longer to achieve. Maybe some never find it. Maybe some people use their hobbies and outside interests to their jobs to get their kicks.
Isn't it funny how you can be completely rational about a topic in the light of day, but when you're trying to sleep at 2am things like not knowing what you want to do when you feel many of your friends do know and are achieving their goals in their fields seems to bother you so much you can't sleep? Attached to this problem of sleep was once again my weight. Obviously!
Sadly I still have not lost anything. That's not to say I've gained, but my best efforts seem to fall by the wayside come evenings. I will do this, I just believe it's going to take a while. I've been super encouraged by this lady's journey and I take a lot of strength from seeing others success.
I've also done a bit of walking in the last few months. My last big walk was a few weeks ago when the weather was still good. My mum and I walked 16 miles. I wore my usual trainers but they began blistering my feet around mile 6 but I continued on which was either brave or stupid depending on your viewpoint! I've invested in some new walking trainers that I hope will see me through. I'm already wearing them on the walk to work (yes - no more traffic queues or public trasnport!) and they seem to be ok.
I think that's more than enough of an update for one day! I hope not to leave it so long next time.
I'll leave you with a pic of me exploring some woods near our new home :)
Monday, 9 April 2012
Here comes the rain!
Alas, as we all knew, the weather was not to last!
Despite this, it's been an enjoyable Easter Bank Holiday weekend filled with lots of fun spring time activities.
On Friday Sam and I went with my sister et al to a farm in the Cotswold village of Broad Campden to meet, feed, hold and generally coo over some Lambs. It is Easter after all.
We got to see a Lamb being born, one get to its feet for the first time and enjoy the countryside air!
This was followed by lunch at the local pub, then an afternoon coffee in our new town, Cheltenham.
Saturday sister, mum and I braved the weather again for a 6 mile walk. Admittedly this was supposed to be longer and yes we did call for back up to pick us up in the car but in our defense we did go out in the first place, it was better than not going at all!
Yesterday we ventured out again(!) to Standish woods, Sam and my dad went through the woods on their bikes doing their crazy jumps and drops, whilst mum & I walked through and admired the bluebells.
I baked some fairy cakes with an Easter twist (i.e. a Cadbury mini egg on top - the search for which took me to 4 different shops on Saturday afternoon!) when we came home then we all traipsed over to my sisters for some food and a walk to our new abode to show the family.
Today the weather just will not let up. There has been no break in the rain since yesterday evening therefore I showered at 2:45pm and have spent the day surfing the net for cleaning ideas, competition entries and eating cake. Nom.
Back to work tomorrow! Booo. But still, another 4 day week.
I'll leave you with some pics of the weekend.
xxx
Despite this, it's been an enjoyable Easter Bank Holiday weekend filled with lots of fun spring time activities.
On Friday Sam and I went with my sister et al to a farm in the Cotswold village of Broad Campden to meet, feed, hold and generally coo over some Lambs. It is Easter after all.
We got to see a Lamb being born, one get to its feet for the first time and enjoy the countryside air!
This was followed by lunch at the local pub, then an afternoon coffee in our new town, Cheltenham.
Saturday sister, mum and I braved the weather again for a 6 mile walk. Admittedly this was supposed to be longer and yes we did call for back up to pick us up in the car but in our defense we did go out in the first place, it was better than not going at all!
Yesterday we ventured out again(!) to Standish woods, Sam and my dad went through the woods on their bikes doing their crazy jumps and drops, whilst mum & I walked through and admired the bluebells.
I baked some fairy cakes with an Easter twist (i.e. a Cadbury mini egg on top - the search for which took me to 4 different shops on Saturday afternoon!) when we came home then we all traipsed over to my sisters for some food and a walk to our new abode to show the family.
Today the weather just will not let up. There has been no break in the rain since yesterday evening therefore I showered at 2:45pm and have spent the day surfing the net for cleaning ideas, competition entries and eating cake. Nom.
Back to work tomorrow! Booo. But still, another 4 day week.
I'll leave you with some pics of the weekend.
xxx
Tuesday, 27 March 2012
Spring has sprung
What beautiful weather our lovely island is having right now! I'm pleased to report that I have taken full advantage of it and have been out walking in training for NYC.
Last Monday I did a little 5 mile route from my house, along the canal and back again. Then on Wednesday my mum and I completed 10.6 miles in 2 hours 59 minutes.
Saturday brought glorious weather and my sister joined us for a route that was supposed to be 8 miles, but ended up at 10.8.
I took some photos en route...
So a good time had by all on Saturday.
Another walk perhaps towards the end of the week, then it will just be weekend walks from the on as I start my new job on Monday!
Last Monday I did a little 5 mile route from my house, along the canal and back again. Then on Wednesday my mum and I completed 10.6 miles in 2 hours 59 minutes.
Saturday brought glorious weather and my sister joined us for a route that was supposed to be 8 miles, but ended up at 10.8.
I took some photos en route...
 |
| Daffodils |
 |
| A new friend made |
 |
| Funky Lamas |
 |
Nothing signals the arrival of spring better than Lambs in the fields |
Today I upped the mileage again and completed 13.8 miles. I'm very pleased as we've got until November to train for the event and it's the end of March and I'm already able to do over half way. Obviously this was with a cafe stop (mmm cake!) and some bench sitting and taking photos and enjoying my surroundings. The actual day will be much harder as it will be 26 miles straight off and continuous walking.
Pics from today...
 |
Mmmm cake |
Another walk perhaps towards the end of the week, then it will just be weekend walks from the on as I start my new job on Monday!
Remember the terrible interview? Not so terrible after all apparently! Am extremely nervous about it but that's normal I'm led to believe. I just have to have some more faith in my ability and do my best.
The Letting Agency finally have all they need from us reference wise in regards to our new abode, so now we're just waiting for a move in date, but we think we'll be moving in towards the end of April.
A big month ahead then! New job, new flat.
We may be getting somewhere!
xxx
Friday, 16 March 2012
Confessions of a carb overload (warning, some TMI over share in this post)
Yesterday my parents went to London for the evening. I'd left the house in the morning around 9am to get the bus over to Cheltenham (the races are on at the moment therefore I didn't want to attempt driving and having to find somewhere to park) and didn't eat before I left.
When I eventually rolled into to Chelt about 2 hours later I had a medium Latte in M&S but again didn't eat as I was registering with a recruitment agency at 12 and have a weird thing about food being stuck in my teeth or bad breath etc (weird I know - why not look in a mirror???).
After the meeting I got the bus back to Gloucester and by this point I'm feeling a bit hungry. It's heading for 2pm so I get in my car and head to Sainsburys. When I get there, I don't get a basket and instead head for the bad section of the supermarket.
Shamefully here's what I bought:
2 x Sausage rolls
Packet of American style double choc chip cookies
Pepperoni Pizza
Garlic bread baguette
Mozzarella Cheese
Jar of green Pesto
1 large ciabatta style piece of bread
When I got home I took a phone call, did some washing and by this point it's getting on for 3pm and I'm ready to roll.
Firstly I eat the 2 sausage rolls whilst I'm cooking the ciabatta bread. I spread the pesto on the bread and sprinkle over the mozzarella and let it all cook.
I eventually sit down around 3:15pm, for my first 'meal' of the day and eat the entire pesto/mozzarella ciabatta bread. I then proceed with the cookies, of which I have 3 by the time the day is over.
Whilst I'm eating I'm getting REALLY FULL. But do I stop? No. I carry on as I'm enjoying the taste and there was no0one around to judge me, look on unfavourably and I figure I haven't eaten all day so it's ok. That's my logic.
Needless to say I felt bloated, full and disgusting the entire evening. Sam had football last night and when he got in around 10pm I cooked the pizza and garlic bread for him, of which I had about half of the garlic bread and a slice of the pizza. I was still full at this point, but it was there and I ate it.
Without going into too much detail here and over sharing, we had the place to ourselves last night, but as my stomach was out so far I could've been mistaken for being 9 months and I felt bloated and uncomfortable with garlic breath, I wasn't exactly feeling 'sexy'.
This morning I have woken up with a still bloated stomach, a lingering garlic taste in my mouth despite brushing my teeth twice already this morning and I feel a bit lethargic. I also weighed myself as I was intrigued and I'd put on 3lbs overnight. Now I'm aware that isn't permanent and it'll be down to all the carbs and salt but even so it's pretty disgusting.
I'm also (even more over share) unable to 'go' this morning.
So why am I telling you all this?
Because this isn't the first time I've had a binge of this kind. Unfortunately it probably won't be the last. But I've never written down my feelings (both physically and mentally) the day after before.
My relationship with food is destructive that's been obvious for a long time, and I'm not going to make an elaborate promise as God as my witness I will never overeat again. I've tried that before and it doesn't work. But I am accountable. There is no-one else to blame but myself.
And all I can do is promise myself that Ill continually try to do better.
xxx
When I eventually rolled into to Chelt about 2 hours later I had a medium Latte in M&S but again didn't eat as I was registering with a recruitment agency at 12 and have a weird thing about food being stuck in my teeth or bad breath etc (weird I know - why not look in a mirror???).
After the meeting I got the bus back to Gloucester and by this point I'm feeling a bit hungry. It's heading for 2pm so I get in my car and head to Sainsburys. When I get there, I don't get a basket and instead head for the bad section of the supermarket.
Shamefully here's what I bought:
2 x Sausage rolls
Packet of American style double choc chip cookies
Pepperoni Pizza
Garlic bread baguette
Mozzarella Cheese
Jar of green Pesto
1 large ciabatta style piece of bread
When I got home I took a phone call, did some washing and by this point it's getting on for 3pm and I'm ready to roll.
Firstly I eat the 2 sausage rolls whilst I'm cooking the ciabatta bread. I spread the pesto on the bread and sprinkle over the mozzarella and let it all cook.
I eventually sit down around 3:15pm, for my first 'meal' of the day and eat the entire pesto/mozzarella ciabatta bread. I then proceed with the cookies, of which I have 3 by the time the day is over.
Whilst I'm eating I'm getting REALLY FULL. But do I stop? No. I carry on as I'm enjoying the taste and there was no0one around to judge me, look on unfavourably and I figure I haven't eaten all day so it's ok. That's my logic.
Needless to say I felt bloated, full and disgusting the entire evening. Sam had football last night and when he got in around 10pm I cooked the pizza and garlic bread for him, of which I had about half of the garlic bread and a slice of the pizza. I was still full at this point, but it was there and I ate it.
Without going into too much detail here and over sharing, we had the place to ourselves last night, but as my stomach was out so far I could've been mistaken for being 9 months and I felt bloated and uncomfortable with garlic breath, I wasn't exactly feeling 'sexy'.
This morning I have woken up with a still bloated stomach, a lingering garlic taste in my mouth despite brushing my teeth twice already this morning and I feel a bit lethargic. I also weighed myself as I was intrigued and I'd put on 3lbs overnight. Now I'm aware that isn't permanent and it'll be down to all the carbs and salt but even so it's pretty disgusting.
I'm also (even more over share) unable to 'go' this morning.
So why am I telling you all this?
Because this isn't the first time I've had a binge of this kind. Unfortunately it probably won't be the last. But I've never written down my feelings (both physically and mentally) the day after before.
My relationship with food is destructive that's been obvious for a long time, and I'm not going to make an elaborate promise as God as my witness I will never overeat again. I've tried that before and it doesn't work. But I am accountable. There is no-one else to blame but myself.
And all I can do is promise myself that Ill continually try to do better.
xxx
Monday, 12 March 2012
This is hard
(That's what she said!!! Hehe, gotta love the American "Office")
To update:
I left my job on February 29th.
I'm down 8lbs in total.
I should be moving next month with the boy to a lovely flat in Cheltenham (freeeedom!!!!).
I'm still not out of my little 'down' period.
Taking the job in the first place was a mistake. I knew the salary was too low for what we need to live our life on, but in times like these I felt that any job was better than none, and figured it would be easy to find another job whilst at this one. I was wrong. It's not easy to speak to prospective employers in a half hour time slot between 12-12:30. They're never able to speak when you're back from work, and even if you do get to an interview stage, how do you get to the interview without your current employer smelling a rat? In the end I spoke to my lovely sister, giver of all amazing advice, who told me that she was behind me 100% and that there was much more I could be doing with my life.
Twelve days later and here I am. I've had two interviews and have two more lined up this week. I've had lots of positive feedback, lots of interest in my CV and feel I'm in a much better position to judge what's the best move for me. Sam is being hugely supportive (as always) and is quite insistent that I be happy with my job choice or else we'll only end up in the same position in another seven weeks! I realise how fortunate I am that I'm in a position where I can be 'picky' about what I take, and it's made me realise that perhaps the right decision was made in coming home from our travels sooner as we have some savings to fall back on at times like these.
As for my 'down' days, well today is one of them. It's a combination of feeling stifled still being at home with the parents (even though we're hopefully moving next month to a beautiful flat only a 5 minute walk away from my sister and the centre of Cheltenham and Pittville Park and the cinema and good shops etc - ooooh excitement!!!) and being a bit bored to be honest! I have a few appointments over the next 3 days though so the boredom should hopefully cease!
My weight loss is still slow. I want to be ok with that! My mum,sister and I are walking the NYC marathon in November for Breast Cancer and so I've been out on a few walks with my mum to begin my training for that. My pace is quite good, we did about 5 miles yesterday in an hour and a half. The previous Saturday we walked for 2 hours 20 and covered 8ish miles. I know that I'll be walking 26 miles and that I won't be able to keep that pace up for that long but a girls got to start somewhere!!!
Ideally I'd like to be a size 14 again. Before we go to New York would be awesome. Here's a pic of last time I went in 2006 where I was around a size 14 (and wanting to lose weight of course!)
Oh to be that size again! And to be happy about it! There's the difference. Reaching a size I'm happy with and maintaining it. Not being on a permanent cycle of needing to lose weight. I think I was in the 12 stone range here. I look happy here.
Was definitely happy here
I don't think losing 3 stone by November is an unachievable target do you?
But first things first eh?
Permanent employment!
xxx
To update:
I left my job on February 29th.
I'm down 8lbs in total.
I should be moving next month with the boy to a lovely flat in Cheltenham (freeeedom!!!!).
I'm still not out of my little 'down' period.
Taking the job in the first place was a mistake. I knew the salary was too low for what we need to live our life on, but in times like these I felt that any job was better than none, and figured it would be easy to find another job whilst at this one. I was wrong. It's not easy to speak to prospective employers in a half hour time slot between 12-12:30. They're never able to speak when you're back from work, and even if you do get to an interview stage, how do you get to the interview without your current employer smelling a rat? In the end I spoke to my lovely sister, giver of all amazing advice, who told me that she was behind me 100% and that there was much more I could be doing with my life.
Twelve days later and here I am. I've had two interviews and have two more lined up this week. I've had lots of positive feedback, lots of interest in my CV and feel I'm in a much better position to judge what's the best move for me. Sam is being hugely supportive (as always) and is quite insistent that I be happy with my job choice or else we'll only end up in the same position in another seven weeks! I realise how fortunate I am that I'm in a position where I can be 'picky' about what I take, and it's made me realise that perhaps the right decision was made in coming home from our travels sooner as we have some savings to fall back on at times like these.
As for my 'down' days, well today is one of them. It's a combination of feeling stifled still being at home with the parents (even though we're hopefully moving next month to a beautiful flat only a 5 minute walk away from my sister and the centre of Cheltenham and Pittville Park and the cinema and good shops etc - ooooh excitement!!!) and being a bit bored to be honest! I have a few appointments over the next 3 days though so the boredom should hopefully cease!
My weight loss is still slow. I want to be ok with that! My mum,sister and I are walking the NYC marathon in November for Breast Cancer and so I've been out on a few walks with my mum to begin my training for that. My pace is quite good, we did about 5 miles yesterday in an hour and a half. The previous Saturday we walked for 2 hours 20 and covered 8ish miles. I know that I'll be walking 26 miles and that I won't be able to keep that pace up for that long but a girls got to start somewhere!!!
Ideally I'd like to be a size 14 again. Before we go to New York would be awesome. Here's a pic of last time I went in 2006 where I was around a size 14 (and wanting to lose weight of course!)
Oh to be that size again! And to be happy about it! There's the difference. Reaching a size I'm happy with and maintaining it. Not being on a permanent cycle of needing to lose weight. I think I was in the 12 stone range here. I look happy here.
Was definitely happy here
 |
| Hehe. What a knob! |
But first things first eh?
Permanent employment!
xxx
Saturday, 25 February 2012
It's been a while...
Since I last posted - Hello again!
To be truthful, I haven't felt like I've anything worth saying - life has pretty much just been ticking along, nothing new to add to the mix so to speak!
Weight loss is slow and steady! I briefly flirted with Slimming World again, until I realised that whilst it's a brilliant eating plan for some, it's always ended up making me feel bloated and bored with what I'm eating. It's too difficult at the moment to eat that differently to my parents, the kitchen is too small! So I've got back to calorie counting, not stressing too much when I go over, as I know I'm much more in control of what I'm eating. Smaller portions of the sweet stuff, soups for lunch and plenty of water seem to be working at the moment.
I had put on 3lbs since first posting but now I'm 7lbs down in total. So I'm pleased. It's going in the right direction!
The boy has been using his Jamie Oliver App to make some beautiful (if not completely healthy) meals...
My mum has now joined me at my weekly Zumba class at the local community centre - it's such good fun. De-stresses me on a Tuesday evening!
So that's about it!
Hopefully next post I'll have some more exciting news to share!
xxx
To be truthful, I haven't felt like I've anything worth saying - life has pretty much just been ticking along, nothing new to add to the mix so to speak!
Weight loss is slow and steady! I briefly flirted with Slimming World again, until I realised that whilst it's a brilliant eating plan for some, it's always ended up making me feel bloated and bored with what I'm eating. It's too difficult at the moment to eat that differently to my parents, the kitchen is too small! So I've got back to calorie counting, not stressing too much when I go over, as I know I'm much more in control of what I'm eating. Smaller portions of the sweet stuff, soups for lunch and plenty of water seem to be working at the moment.
I had put on 3lbs since first posting but now I'm 7lbs down in total. So I'm pleased. It's going in the right direction!
 |
| Fish, Spinach & Potato Pie |
 |
| Ham, Chicken & Leek Pie |
Some running around the canal has also featured on chilly mornings...
 |
| Stretching post-run |
So that's about it!
Hopefully next post I'll have some more exciting news to share!
xxx
Sunday, 29 January 2012
Positivity
The last 2 weeks have been about me trying to get the better of my recent negativity.
I'm not normally a negative person. My family used to joke that I was so laid back I was horizontal, and that it took a lot to wind me up and get me into a state.
Not so much the case anymore. Maybe it's an age thing?!
Or maybe it's just due to such a big change in my life from the last few years, and it's not a change I'd really planned for. Most of my life has had direction and a purpose - I always knew where I was going next. At school, I knew to work hard, get good grades then go to Uni. At Uni my goal was my year abroad in the States, followed by getting a degree to be proud of.
After Uni, get a job. Done. After getting job, have a few years of having fun with the money.
Then the goal became travelling and so I saved and planned.
Now we're back. And I've felt like I don't know where I'm heading. I've spent the last month or so just feeling so lost and it's not really like me.
And I haven't been dealing with it very well!
More tears and ups and downs have been the past 2 weeks. Getting to grips with my new job, taking in some exercise, spending time with the boy and friends, and trying not to fall out too badly with my parents etc etc!
There have been some highlights though...
I'm not normally a negative person. My family used to joke that I was so laid back I was horizontal, and that it took a lot to wind me up and get me into a state.
Not so much the case anymore. Maybe it's an age thing?!
Or maybe it's just due to such a big change in my life from the last few years, and it's not a change I'd really planned for. Most of my life has had direction and a purpose - I always knew where I was going next. At school, I knew to work hard, get good grades then go to Uni. At Uni my goal was my year abroad in the States, followed by getting a degree to be proud of.
After Uni, get a job. Done. After getting job, have a few years of having fun with the money.
Then the goal became travelling and so I saved and planned.
Now we're back. And I've felt like I don't know where I'm heading. I've spent the last month or so just feeling so lost and it's not really like me.
And I haven't been dealing with it very well!
More tears and ups and downs have been the past 2 weeks. Getting to grips with my new job, taking in some exercise, spending time with the boy and friends, and trying not to fall out too badly with my parents etc etc!
There have been some highlights though...
 |
| Visiting Clevedon last Saturday |
 |
| Beautiful winter sunsets |
 |
| Stunning Cotswold village - Bourton-on-the-water |
 |
| Windy day! I have to learn to be a bit more patient with the speed at which things are moving. Eventually Sam & I will move out from the parents and be back in a place of our own again. Quite rightly Sam wants a few months worth of wages behind us before we move anywhere. I have also come to the conclusion that I'm ok with waiting for the right (note right, not perfect!) job to come along. I'm in touch with a recruitment consultant, but I'm not in desperate need of finding something right now, given that I already have something so it means I can be a bit more choosy with what I go for. Things will get better, of that I'm pretty positive ;) xxx |
Sunday, 15 January 2012
A strange old week
Tomorrow I will start a new job. The one I didn't get. The person who did get it declined to take up the offer hence me getting a call on Tuesday. After some thinking time I figured I should take it, I need to start earning some money and even though I'm not totally convinced it's 'the job' for me, in this current climate I'm not going to turn down a wage.
My mood at the moment is pretty, for want of a better word, 'dulled'. Wednesday evening and Thursday were awful, I had a complete breakdown and after an argument with another driver, completely broke down in a car park and cried those unstoppable, huge, sobbing tears that only come along once in a while.
I cried on and off all day and after a chat with my family I feel the better for it. I think I'd been trying to be so positive about the fact that we were back I'd been masking my emotions. Even though my head knows we were right to return, my heart still hasn't got the message, and is hankering for an ideal still of what should have been. Sometimes you need that good cry, but it means that now I'm feeling neither hugely positive or negative. I'm sort of indifferent. And I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not!
On the weight front, I've gained 2lbs this week. It's due to the fact that I've slowed down my rate of loss, as I've come in under calories everyday this week, have eaten on average around 1800kcals a day and I've exercised 4 times this week.
Monday night I went to Step Aerobics, Tuesday was Zumba, Wednesday was Body Combat and this morning I drove over to Cheltenham to do an outside Boot Camp class at Montpellier park with my sister. All good fun. I've definitely needed the exercise this week, God knows where I would have been emotionally without it!
So even though I've gained I'm ok with it. As the blog title says this is a journey. And it's going to be a long one! The weight didn't go on overnight so it won't come off overnight. There's going to be ups and downs to it. The fact is I'm eating less and exercising more, so eventually, it's going to happen!
Sunday, 8 January 2012
The good news is...
Sam has got a job. He starts tomorrow :-)
The bad news is that I haven't :-(
Unfortunately I did not get the job I interviewed for on Thursday. Apparently I interviewed well, but the other candidates were stronger. I felt the interview had gone well, and I'd shortlisted from 45 candidates which I'm pleased with, but sadly it was not to be.
However, I'm remaining positive! I have another interview lined up for 19th January and I'm still applying for other positions so I'm sure something will come up.
Food wise, I've come in over my calorie allowance 5 out of the last 7 days. I've not gone over by huge amounts, and I'm still showing a loss on the scales, but I've decided to slow down my rate of loss to 1lb per week. This is much more manageable and stops me feeling like a bit of a failure. The important part is that I'm losing. That's the trend that I want to continue.
On the exercise front, I went to an aerobics class on Thursday night, my first for a while, demonstrated by my complete lack of co-ordination!
Today I took a drive up to Haresfield Beacon and had a short walk through the woods. I needed the fresh air and some time on my own to think. I think I chose the perfect spot...
It was certainly needed! I'm not my normal happy self at the moment, I yearn for some routine back in my life! I think back to last year when I was working and how I used to wish the days away until I had holiday, I never thought I'd be the girl itching to work! Funny how things change...
The bad news is that I haven't :-(
Unfortunately I did not get the job I interviewed for on Thursday. Apparently I interviewed well, but the other candidates were stronger. I felt the interview had gone well, and I'd shortlisted from 45 candidates which I'm pleased with, but sadly it was not to be.
However, I'm remaining positive! I have another interview lined up for 19th January and I'm still applying for other positions so I'm sure something will come up.
Food wise, I've come in over my calorie allowance 5 out of the last 7 days. I've not gone over by huge amounts, and I'm still showing a loss on the scales, but I've decided to slow down my rate of loss to 1lb per week. This is much more manageable and stops me feeling like a bit of a failure. The important part is that I'm losing. That's the trend that I want to continue.
On the exercise front, I went to an aerobics class on Thursday night, my first for a while, demonstrated by my complete lack of co-ordination!
Today I took a drive up to Haresfield Beacon and had a short walk through the woods. I needed the fresh air and some time on my own to think. I think I chose the perfect spot...
Monday, 2 January 2012
A trip to the cafe
Breakfast
Jordan's Jumbo Oats with skimmed milk, Apple & Cinnamon (pictured)
Boiled Egg
Cup of Tea made with skimmed milk
Lunch
Jacket Potato with Tuna Mayonnaise and side salad without dressing
Hot Chocolate
Dinner
M&S Haddock with baked beans
Weight Watchers Dessert
Snacks
4 x Tea with skimmed milk
2 pints water
Fairy Cake
Exercise
Another jog/walk - 19 minutes jogging this time (and 2 hills!)
Stats for the day
Daily calorie allowance - 1604
Exercise calories earned - 178
Total calorie allowance - 1782
Calories consumed - 1911
Calories over quota - 129
Calories to maintain current weight - 2604
Fruit & Veg portions - 5.3
Thoughts on the day
I'm feeling pleased with today. I went out for an unexpected lunch with my sister and boyfriend to a lovely cafe just down the road in Saul (http://www.thestablescafe.co.uk/index.html) which could have been disastrous. I went last Wednesday with my best friend having not seen her for over 3 months and enjoyed a chicken, mozzarella and pesto panini with quite a large bowl of chips on the side and a hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows.
Now I'm not saying it was bad, it was bloody lovely, but today's choices were a smidge healthier. I still had a hot chocolate (I think allowing myself a little 'treat' once a day will help to keep me on track) but this time without the cream and marshmallows. I also had a jacket potato instead of a bread based lunch & chips!
I also went out on another small jog which I'm also pleased with. Another 2km. I know it doesn't look like much and it certainly wasn't fast but it's better than doing nothing. And with the hills I did feel like I'd done something. I'm still a far cry away however from the girl who did the Bristol 10k last May but I'll get there.
The eagle eyed amongst you may have noticed that my calorie allowance has gone up slightly, but this is due to having put on a few lbs over the New Year period. I'm not going to beat myself up about it, I'm still on track for what I want to achieve this year.
Tomorrow will be another 'test' day. I'm meeting some friends for coffee in the afternoon followed by dinner in the evening. We've yet to decide where we'll be going but I'm going to make a special effort to choose wisely in my food choices wherever we end. If I go over my calories, so be it, but there's going over by a small amount that you can make up for with exercise later, and going over in the 'sod it I'm out for dinner I'll have 3 courses' amount, that comes in at 1000kcals over and buggers you up for the rest of the week. I'm aiming for the former.
In other news, I'm still waiting to hear from the insurance company, but Sam has two interviews lined up for this week. A second interview at the place he interviewed at before Christmas on Friday, and a first interview on Thursday for a company in the Gloucestershire area. We're extremely excited about both options :) Here's hoping I get some news tomorrow since people will be back to work after the bank holiday.
Fingers crossed!
Jordan's Jumbo Oats with skimmed milk, Apple & Cinnamon (pictured)
Boiled Egg
Cup of Tea made with skimmed milk
Lunch
Jacket Potato with Tuna Mayonnaise and side salad without dressing
Hot Chocolate
Dinner
M&S Haddock with baked beans
Weight Watchers Dessert
Snacks
4 x Tea with skimmed milk
2 pints water
Fairy Cake
Exercise
Another jog/walk - 19 minutes jogging this time (and 2 hills!)
Stats for the day
Daily calorie allowance - 1604
Exercise calories earned - 178
Total calorie allowance - 1782
Calories consumed - 1911
Calories over quota - 129
Calories to maintain current weight - 2604
Fruit & Veg portions - 5.3
Thoughts on the day
I'm feeling pleased with today. I went out for an unexpected lunch with my sister and boyfriend to a lovely cafe just down the road in Saul (http://www.thestablescafe.co.uk/index.html) which could have been disastrous. I went last Wednesday with my best friend having not seen her for over 3 months and enjoyed a chicken, mozzarella and pesto panini with quite a large bowl of chips on the side and a hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows.
Now I'm not saying it was bad, it was bloody lovely, but today's choices were a smidge healthier. I still had a hot chocolate (I think allowing myself a little 'treat' once a day will help to keep me on track) but this time without the cream and marshmallows. I also had a jacket potato instead of a bread based lunch & chips!
I also went out on another small jog which I'm also pleased with. Another 2km. I know it doesn't look like much and it certainly wasn't fast but it's better than doing nothing. And with the hills I did feel like I'd done something. I'm still a far cry away however from the girl who did the Bristol 10k last May but I'll get there.
The eagle eyed amongst you may have noticed that my calorie allowance has gone up slightly, but this is due to having put on a few lbs over the New Year period. I'm not going to beat myself up about it, I'm still on track for what I want to achieve this year.
Tomorrow will be another 'test' day. I'm meeting some friends for coffee in the afternoon followed by dinner in the evening. We've yet to decide where we'll be going but I'm going to make a special effort to choose wisely in my food choices wherever we end. If I go over my calories, so be it, but there's going over by a small amount that you can make up for with exercise later, and going over in the 'sod it I'm out for dinner I'll have 3 courses' amount, that comes in at 1000kcals over and buggers you up for the rest of the week. I'm aiming for the former.
In other news, I'm still waiting to hear from the insurance company, but Sam has two interviews lined up for this week. A second interview at the place he interviewed at before Christmas on Friday, and a first interview on Thursday for a company in the Gloucestershire area. We're extremely excited about both options :) Here's hoping I get some news tomorrow since people will be back to work after the bank holiday.
Fingers crossed!
Sunday, 1 January 2012
Happy New Year
Soooo glad that NYE is done! It's not my favourite time of the year, I dislike the forced revelry, the £20 it costs to get into your local pub, and the way it forces you to look back at the old year. As mentioned, our plans didn't work out quite as we expected them to with regards to our trip away, and whilst we had an amazing time and the decision was correct to come home, seeing the fireworks over Sydney Harbour Bridge and knowing that this time last year we thought we were going to be there to see it was a bittersweet pill to swallow.
However, it's a new year, and as soon as it hit midnight and the fireworks began after Big Ben's chimes, I immediately felt more positive than I have done for the past few weeks since returning. It's so cliche but it is a new start, and especially given our current situation, a complete blank canvass. I genuinely have no plans for this year. No bridesmaids fittings to get myself in a tis about, no holiday plans, I mean, I don't even know what sort of income I'm going to be getting this year so I cannot even plan where to live! (This doesn't stop me researching though..."oh hello Rightmove", heh heh). I am content to just see what the year brings me, to leave last year behind and concentrate on the future.
This isn't to say I don't have some goals for the year. Obviously the biggest one being to lose weight, which has already been discussed. Before we left Australia Sam and I made a list of joint and individual goals for the year. It was important to us both that we took something from our experience away and our reasons for going in the first place. We didn't want to feel like we hadn't learnt anything. In hindsight this was ridiculous because we'd learnt an incredible amount about other cultures, history, and each other. Nevertheless we wanted to make sure that we put our all into 2012, and did the basics to keep ourselves happy, and not feeling like we were just existing like we did before.
Therefore, a very colourful document was created called "Sam and Trudie's 2012 goals" (catchy title right?!). Here are some of those goals for the year ahead:
Here's to 2012!!!
However, it's a new year, and as soon as it hit midnight and the fireworks began after Big Ben's chimes, I immediately felt more positive than I have done for the past few weeks since returning. It's so cliche but it is a new start, and especially given our current situation, a complete blank canvass. I genuinely have no plans for this year. No bridesmaids fittings to get myself in a tis about, no holiday plans, I mean, I don't even know what sort of income I'm going to be getting this year so I cannot even plan where to live! (This doesn't stop me researching though..."oh hello Rightmove", heh heh). I am content to just see what the year brings me, to leave last year behind and concentrate on the future.
This isn't to say I don't have some goals for the year. Obviously the biggest one being to lose weight, which has already been discussed. Before we left Australia Sam and I made a list of joint and individual goals for the year. It was important to us both that we took something from our experience away and our reasons for going in the first place. We didn't want to feel like we hadn't learnt anything. In hindsight this was ridiculous because we'd learnt an incredible amount about other cultures, history, and each other. Nevertheless we wanted to make sure that we put our all into 2012, and did the basics to keep ourselves happy, and not feeling like we were just existing like we did before.
Therefore, a very colourful document was created called "Sam and Trudie's 2012 goals" (catchy title right?!). Here are some of those goals for the year ahead:
· To spend one day a weekend on outdoor activities (exercise)
· Save enough money in separate accounts to spend on personal items, or to keep current accounts healthy.
· To each undertake an educational course (night school)
· To undertake a form of exercise at least twice a week
· To eat more cleanly.
I also have another, which is to use Facebook less. It's not always the best use of my time, and definitely not healthy to keep comparing yourself to others, and misinterpreting what people say and mean. I want to put less of my life on there, which I know is ironic given how I'm putting a lot of it on this blog. But anyone who reads this (if there even is anyone!), doesn't know me in 'real' life, and I can put myself out there without feeling judged.
All in all then, I'm feeling pretty positive. Sam has got a second interview on Friday which we're very hopeful about, and I had a good chat with my mum this morning about some issues that were bothering me and I feel the air has been cleared a bit which is always healthy.
Speaking of healthy, I went for a jog-walk this morning! Only 20 minutes, 17 jogging (including 2 hills!) and 3 minutes walking. According to WLR I've earned 172 calories from it, and it got me out in the fresh air.
I came home and enjoyed some jumbo oats with skimmed milk and cinnamon, followed by a boiled egg. It's Sunday Roast day over here and we've got some pork so I'm looking forward to that, but in line with my 2012 goal I shall be passing on dessert, instead opting for an Apple.
I may post later today about how I've got on.
Here's to 2012!!!
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